I Need Inspiration

Right now definitely stuck in a rut, same scene, same faces, same drama and nothings happening. I NEEED to be inspired and amazed.

Looking at universities, finding 250 words that will make me appeal to a university in a personal statement, and spending the rest of my time asleep, at work or looking for more work. Knowing that in 5 years time i'l have just finished uni, hello debt!

I definitely need inspiration and something new in my life, even a visit to the rock would be good. To get away from the drama and constant nagging of home life. In need of a trip to Selfridges for the day, getting lost in leather and fabric is the best way to deal with everything.

Recently I've got lost in my music again, after 4 years of not playing, I've given up and resisted into the piano, and it feels so good, so I spend hours upon hours playing and loosing myself in music along with reading, every emotion comes out through my music and long may it stay this way although how I'm going to live without piano at uni I honestly do not know.

Something bring me inspiration and a holiday!

<3 X

Goodbye Facebook!

I have just deleted facebook, lets see how long this lasts! I am fed up of everything and everyone knowing everyone elses business, although im one of the nosiest people ever!

But now it means i have to do something else rather than sit on facebook, instead it shall be on skype or the Tiffany website, i may even blog more!

But so long facebook for now!

<3 X

Games

Playing games is definitely how some people deal with situations. Me being one of them, I need to man the fuck up and stop beating around the bush!

I also need a full time job and money so I can buy a new tv and clothes.

Rant over :-) however I do miss the beach and sunshine!

<3 X

It's Been A While!

It has definitely been a while since I've been on here, and SO much has happened!

3 holidays, Birthday, A-Level results, New job, New hair & most of all causing complete chaos over summer! However i'm back with a bang and life is about to get a lot more serious, jobs & uni applications going ahead, next year is definitely a busy one! However the best thing is knowing i can rewind by the piano in the evening.

Winter is coming as I've started wearing coats & scarves although i've spent most of the summer in scarves after pneumonia scared me! Goodbye hot sunshine and lazy evenings spent with the girls on the patio with cocktails, its back to bed and tv as my girls have left for uni! And i have had a very short lived boat season, next year will be completely different and so will the winter season, time for socks, coats and layers!

I had the most amazing holiday away with the girls which was very much needed, a week of sun, sand, pool and nights out. Still deciding how mine and kathryn's flailing went down in GC and how none of us fell off the banana boat, but what an amazing holiday although we did look forward to our own beds and no cockroaches. Definitely suffering from lack of sun and tan now though!

My 18th meant i saw my best friend and i cannot tell you how good it was to catch up and spend nights awake sorting out all our dramas, missing her now! However there was a big part of my life that was missing at my 18th, although that wont be missing at the rest of my birthdays! The police turnt up, i caused chaos and more confusion and all in all it was such a good night, thank you to everyone who turnt up! My birthday meant i was spoilt and Tiffany jewellery went down SO well, its difficult to explain my face after being presented with duck blue boxes and white ribbons. However one of the most precious presents will be from that person, who knows exactly who they are :-).

Spent most of August either drunk, in bed or at work, I sorted out confusion made some of the most difficult decisions, was torn apart and ripped up into a million pieces this summer. Good and bad bits, absolutely crazy parts of the summer which i will never remember, attempted to leave the damage and destruction, however its me and i end up picking up whats left gluing it back together and realising some of the most important things and there are some people i know i cannot deal without.

I have found my happy place, my future and where i need to be. So the next 3/4 years are dedicated to getting there. Me being a stubborn cow means il do it, so watch this space im back and plan on blogging more!

<3 X

Londonnn

I've spent this past week racing around sorting out things for my holiday, friends relationships and also for my birthday party, but the past 2 days I've spent on trains and tubes going to and from London and now I remember how much I love London!

From the moment I set foot on Chiltern Railways train thursday morning I was instantly excited and as soon as we got into Marylebone, I was generally excited although maybe that was the insanely attractive guy that walked past as I got off the train, but as I got ono the tubes and clung to the right side of the escalator whilst tons of people pushed past I realised what I was missing out on.

After applying for FRA this september, if i don't get in and if I want to continue past level 4, I need a degree so LCF information sessions were inevitable! Thursday was only a quick trip to London as there is was so much going on at home, but TODAY was the day in London, on the first train out after 9, and at High Holborn by 11, London was craazy today especially Oxford Street as normal and Covent Garden, but that generally doesn't put me off, people rushing around pushing past and getting on with day to day things.

The hustle and bustle of London has just made me even more excited about what is around the corner, I seem to get so excited by the city and everything thats going on that is SO different, from wandering around Covent Garden, to walking through Soho in a desperate attempt to get onto Oxford Street to find one particular shop. Every part of London is so different yet feels so the same, whilst walking up the back of Oxford Street past John Princes Street and hearing a girl come out of LCF screaming down the phone saying she got a first, I was genuinely excited for her and I didn't know her, but as I walked back up Harley Street towards Marylebone the scenery changed to big town houses and expensive cars but it was still London. The only thing I struggle with is the roads and cars, I seem to get in a mixture with taxi's and buses in the middle of the road, but that will come to me :-).

Who knew a city could bring someone so much pleasure and excitement, but now off on holiday for a week with the girls, I cannot wait to get out of the country again and be able to lie on the beach and forget everything, lets just hope I don't come back with pneumonia but with a suntaaan, and everything in England sorts itself out!

<3 X

Revision

Is a bitch.

I Want A Dalmatian

Smile

NEW song <33

You know that I'm a crazy bitch,
 I do what I want when I feel like it, 

All I wanna do is loose control, 

But you don't really give a shit, 

You go with go with go with it, 

Cause you're fucking crazy rock-n-roll 

You said hey, 

What's your name, 

It took one look, 

And now I'm not the same, 

Yeah you said hey, 

And since that day, 

You stole my heart and you're the one to blame, 

Yeah. 

And that's why... I smile, 

It's been a while, 

Since everyday and everything has felt this right... 

And now, 

You turn it all around, 

And suddenly you're all I need, 

The reason why I,

I smile. 

Last night I blacked out I think, 

What did you what did you put in my drink? 

I remember making out and then, 

I woke up with a new tattoo, 

Your name was on me and my name was on you, 

I would do it all over again. 

You said hey, 

What's your name, 

It took one look, 

And now i'm not the same, 

You said hey, 

And since that day, 

You stole my heart and you're the one to blame, 

Yeah. 

And that's why... I smile, 

It's been a while, 

Since everyday and everything has felt this right... 

And now, 

You turn it all around, 

And suddenly you're all I need, 

The reason why-I-I-I, 

I smi-I-ile. 

You know that I'm a crazy bitch, 

I do what I want , when I feel like it 

All I wanna do is loose control, 

You know that I'm a crazy bitch, 

I do what I want , when I feel like it 

All I wanna do is loose control-o-ol. 

And that's why... I smile, 

It's been a while, 

Since everyday and everything has felt this right... 

And now, 

You turn it all around, 

And suddenly you're all I need, 

The reason why-I-I-I, 

I smi-I-ile, 

The reason, 

The reason why-I-I-I, 

I smi-I-ile, 

The reason why-I-I-I, 

I smi-I-ile.

2 days i'll be lying on a beach <33

Hello Boating Season!

The boating season started so early this year and with me at work at stuff going on at home, i missed the best start to the season - Easter weekend, but now i'm on study leave i'm definitely making up for it!

There is nothing better than the sea air and going across the water at 30knots, i cannot wait for the rest of the season, whether i end up in Salcombe, Dartmouth or The Channel Islands.

Holiday

I cannot wait to get out of the country next weekend for a week and leave everything behind here.

Genuinely

Hate the people that don't understand politeness, understandably not everyone has the same interest but i am so bored of the people that just take the piss out of something that you find interesting. At least have decency and respect instead of laughing. Maybe people just don't genuinely understand that people are different and that not everyone loves watching youtube videos constantly.

Rant over, and i have no job in two weeks..

Breakfast At Tiffany's

Favourite film ever..

Paul Varjak: I love you.
Holly Golightly: So what.
Paul Varjak: So what? So plenty! I love you, you belong to me!
Holly Golightly: No. People don't belong to people.
Paul Varjak: Of course they do!
Holly Golightly: I'll never let ANYBODY put me in a cage.
Paul Varjak: I don't want to put you in a cage, I want to love you! 

Paul Varjak: You know what's wrong with you, Miss Whoever-You-Are? You're chicken, you've got no guts. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say, "Okay, life's a fact, people do fall in love, people do belong to each other, because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness." You call yourself a free spirit, a wild thing, and you're terrified somebody's going to stick you in a cage. Well, baby, you're already in that cage. You built it yourself. And it's not bounded in the west by Tulip, Texas, or in the east by Somaliland. It's wherever you go. Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself. 

<3

Clothing In Stores

This is only quick, but i feel i haven't blogged in a while and these are my general thoughts on today as it stands.

In the past week i've been shopping twice for clothes, and i am so uninspired by everything in stores at the moment, in consideration i haven't been to fabulous places to shop, the local town with no stores and in the stores i could name everything, or the bigger shopping centre i always get lost in but with my 13 year old brother, yes its difficult to shop. But even when i see something i may like, i try it on and then i cannot stand it or it doesn't suit me. This puts me in a bad mood and i feel sorry for Kelly earlier as i got cross because i couldn't find anything i remotely liked earlier.

I don't know whats wrong with me, and why i'm so uninspired with fashion in shops, but i hope it gets better. I obviously need a trip to London and the Covent Garden boutiques ASAP!

<3

Done

With the constant lying and name calling, the immaturity and the backstabbing, honestly if i ever trust a person again it will be to soon.


When you really trust someone, you have to be okay with not understanding some things - however sometimes people backstab therefore make sure you understand everything



I'm done.

I'm Giving Up

on people and so many things right now.

McQueen, Oh How I Adore You

Earlier this week i wasn't that interested in the royal wedding, i though it was a lot of hype for something that i wasn't really interested in. However i was so interested in the dress that Catherine Middleton was to wear along with the fact i just finished mine for my final A-level piece. But for ages we've been guessing who was to design the royal wedding dress, to start with i thought it may be someone understated like Princess Diana's wedding dress designer Emanuel, but the more and more i thought about it i thought of British designers and did wonder about McQueen and Amanda Wakeley and then when i heard that Sarah Burton of Alexander McQueen was seen going into Catherine's hotel i didn't quite believe it. 


At 7.40 this morning when i woke up this morning to go down to the coast, watching the news about the wedding i decided i wanted to be in London, but tough luck. Anyway half way across the solent i receive a text saying that it was Sarah Burton of Alexander McQueen designing the wedding dress and that she looked stunning, Fuck was i annoyed that i wasn't anywhere near london or a TV. So theres me just after designing and making a wedding dress i started having a conversation with my mum on how i would have designed the wedding dress, this was before seeing the actual dress, mine was lace arms and bodice above the bust going into a sweetheart corset with the back coming up to the neck like a bolero, then a v neck into a corset type bodice which hugged the figure to the waist and then elegantly flowed into a reasonably long train. So when i finally got enough signal to get on the internet, i was googling to see Catherine in the wedding dress.. Wow when i saw it i was in ore she looked so beautiful and the dress did Sarah Burton of Alexander McQueen and myself so proud. 


I was so excited by the fact that id come up with an image and design in my head and then i was partially correct although it came in more at the waist than i would have designed but today i have been in my element considering the fact that i've been pretty pissed off with the fact that i want to be in london so damn bad. The dress made my jaw drop and then later on during the evening when i found out that her evening reception dress is also by McQueen, I am in my element and Catherine's sisters dress was also amazing!

I find this dress absolutely stunning and was even more amazed by the dress when i found out that firstly it represents an opening flower with the lace having intricate designs of different flowers, along with the lace embroidery going up the skirt of the dress and secondly the fact that the dress has a large influence from Grace Kelly's wedding dress when she married Ranier III, Prince of Monaco and became Princess Grace of Monaco in 1956. The dress followed the influence of a lace appliqué bodice and sleeves along with a high waisted full skirt with a long train, even the accessories were similar with Catherine wearing a Cartier tiara borrowed from the Queen and the thin veil. This dress was definitely fit for a princess and i am so jealous. 

I think today i have watched the Royal Wedding over and over again and i am still not bored of it, a bit like the documentary McQueen and I, i adore Alexander McQueen and now Sarah Burton is creative director at McQueen after Alexander McQueen's suicide last year, i adore the fashion house even more and the wedding collections have never failed to amaze me. Sarah Burton of Alexander McQueen will be known worldwide for an amazing creation that she designed with and for Catherine Middleton who had an exact idea of what she wanted.

It was truly outstanding.

Although i'm completely at loss with it, i adore the idea of love and i'm truly a sucker for love and romance. 

<3

Female Vocals

I'm a sucker for female vocals and key changes in a song especially slow ones, and i have a new song.. Turning Tables but with Gwyneth Paltrow singing, i never knew she could sing but i want her voice! Well in general i would love to be able to sing but i've had singing lessons for about 4 weeks and didn't like the teacher so that went well..

I heard it on glee, and i don't normally watch the tv programme but when you cant sleep boredom makes you do weird things, and this is a glee which hasn't been released in the UK yet and it was based on a night of neglect, so anyway its an Adele song and normally i find Adele a bit tedious sometimes as she seems to drone on at times, but with Gwyneth Paltrow singing it, this song actually touched me and i felt close to it.

Turning Tables

Close enough to start a war 

All that I have is on the floor 

God only knows what we're fighting for 

All that I say, you always say more 

I can't keep up with your turning tables 

Under your thumb, I can't breathe 

So, I won't let you close enough to hurt me 

No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me 

I cant give you, what you think you gave me 

It's time to say goodbye to turning tables 

To turning tables 

Under haunted skies I see ooh 

Where love is lost, your ghost is found 

I braved a hundred storms to leave you 

As hard as you try, no I will never be knocked down 

I can't keep up with your turning tables 

Under your thumb, I can't breathe 

So, I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no 

I won't ask you, you to just desert me 

I cant give you, what you think you gave me 

It's time to say goodbye to turning tables 

Turning tables 

Next time I'll be braver 

I'll be my own savior 

When the thunder calls for me 

Next time I'll be braver 

I'll be my own savior 

Standing on my own two feet 

I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no 

I won't ask you, you to just desert me 

I cant give you, what you think you gave me 

It's time to say goodbye to turning tables 

To turning tables 

Turning tables, yeah 

Turning, oh 

This song i feel reflects so much of what used to go on my mind about 2/3 years ago and i'm glad i'm out of that phase of my life and that now i am happy and i completely believe in this song. This song has affected me and made me think and has given me countless car journeys with this song on repeat in the sunshine, especially during the key changes around the 5th verse, i actually get so engrossed in this song and i honestly am hooked right now.

So until i find a new song that i can obsess overr..

<3

I'm a foool

for love and romance, even though i'm at a loss with it right now.

Goodbye Holiday!

I never expected that my Easter holidays would turn out how they did but hey its a good thing! But now although its the last weekend and i go back to school on Wednesday, FUCK have i got loads to do in hours, like make a wedding dress oh and the coursework folder to go alongside the wedding dress and the bugger is that i need 140 points for the grade i want, sleepless nights here i come!

So although the Easter holidays aren't officially but over to me they are, I won't be going out and staying out till 3am any more, i shall be in sewing till my hands are numb because my coursework will be handed in on Thursday morning whether i'm going to be drugged up on caffeine or not.

Never did i expect that my holidays would turn out how they did, my car broke which i'm getting used too as it normally happens during the holiday, i can find my way to and from Wycombe insanely easy - i think my car can actually get there on auto pilot and i've realised i don't need 12 hours sleep every night and sometimes i can live with 4 hours and still make sense the following day. I've learnt new things, i can be insanely stubborn and i have a face which i thought was ugly but i've been told is cute so not going to complain, but holidays are pretty much over and i'm going to miss people well a person and now i'm going to crack down with my coursework so next Thursday i will be so free.

Also now i have work 1 till 5, i'm tired and my back kills so 4 hours standing up i may be a cripple at the end of the day, but i have the girls over for take out this evening and i have had a good holiday so i'm not going to complain although i would love a day on a beach right now..

Anyway i have to get ready for work before i fall asleep again, i shall update on a rant on life soon :-)
<3

Currently

Wishing i had about £25,000 to spend in Tiffany's, this is why i shouldn't be allowed the internet because i mind and eyes wander from online store to online store, like last night there i was on Facebook and next i know i'm on my new favourite online store netaporter.com, of course i don't have the money to buy the clothes, but i can dream and look but after i browse through there after finding the Christian Louboutin black patent court shoes i've wanted for years! I moved on to Vivienne Westwood, not complaining i found some nice dresses for my mum to wear to my cousins wedding but still wasn't quite happy with what online store i was looking at.

Then of course about 10 minutes later i'm back on the Tiffany website, if someone asked me to name the different collections give me five minutes and i could tell you. I actually love the store, the store in Westfield blows my mind, just the sparkle and if someone asked i could easily give them a list of the jewellery i'd want from there. I get that buzz when i see a turquoise bag with the effortless "Tiffany & Co" written on the bag, there you go my ideal present the turquoise bag with the turquoise box and white ribbon - it must be white ribbon, the red ribbon is just a no go! When in Westfield i have been know to just go in there and look at the sparkle of diamonds, and then realise i can't actually afford anything so have to walk out due to the looks i get from the staff, maybe thats why Breakfast at Tiffany's is one of my favourite films... I must say my next must go too is Tiffany's on Bond Street, next time i'm in London you will find me in there!

So what brings me to be writing about Tiffany's and how much i love it, well i'm currently sitting on my sofa in the lounge whilst Josh is playing the piano and he is so good, although he says he isn't, but whilst i was listening to him play, i casually clicked on safari and next thing you know i'm on Tiffany & Co and i don't even know why, i think because its on my top sites i see it and i am automatically drawn to the website.

So at the moment i'm sitting on one of my gorgeous lounge sofas, writing this, listening to Josh play the piano and getting a glimpse of the sun through the window of the lounge as its a gorgeous day outside, why i'm inside i don't know but it's a good day. 

I'm doing quite well on updating this regularly but then it is still new to me, i'm sure it will deteriorate. Until i next have something to write.

<3

Epiphany's && Inspiration

Recently with everything thats happened i feel that my life has undergone construction and WOW do i feel so much different, probably because i was stuck in a rut. Now i feel so inspiredd and alive its pretty amazing, maybe its because i haven't actually got into my bed before 3am for the past few days, but definitely not complaining.

I honestly believe i've had an epiphany on life, and i feel high but its good, firstly because its legal and secondly i no longer feel like everyone is out to get me, and i guess that everyone goes through those periods in their lives, mine just all came at once... but at least if it happens again i know that i will come out the other side so much better off. I digress.. my epiphany was literally on life, yes shit happens and another well known line in my house "it never rains but it pours" but we're alive and kicking, pretty strong and waiting to see what the rest of the year brings us.

So this probably seems like i've been resurrected or gone through some tragedy or near death experience and when you actually look at it, i realise it was pretty minor considering what some people go through but anyway it was a big deal to me at the time and i can now positively say that i'm the happiest i've been in a while and looking forward to everything and anything.

Moving on.. the inspiration that has lead me to.. at the moment nothing... but shortly a lot of things, many people have inspired me throughout my life but i think this is the most inspired i have felt in a while. I now have a list of things i want to achieve, go to, do and i plan on completing that list. Inspiration has come from My Mum & Dad, My Girls, Audrey Hepburn & a few other people, i've taken advice and listened to them and i will continue to do so.

Although i will never be as beautiful as Audrey Hepburn although i'd love to be, and i will never be in films, a model, or most probably wont be famous not that i'd even want too, but i have been inspired to be myself and do and complete what i set out to do and take what life throws at you.. i need to stop planning whats next and live for whats now.

Till then

<3

Hello Blogging!

Im so new to all of this blogging stuff, but it seems a good way of getting out what i want to say, without everyone listening that doesn't care.. that happens a lot.


Anyway.. about me - I'm Charlotte, 17 and just about to leave school (cannot wait), wanting to go into fashion or retail, currently working at Burtons Menswear and have to say that i love it, the people are amazing and i love my girly chats with Hayley every saturday without fail. I love my family and recently have got so much closer to my parents, probably because i've grown up a lot in 2011, I have the best girls and currently being inspired by my family, people and generally life at the moment.


I ramble and get cross about the most irrelevant things, such as someone making a smart comment or not replying to an urgent text, i can also be a moody bitch at times, but shit happens. 


So whoever is reading this obviously has taken an interest in me, which is kind of new for me , or i've forced them to read it but thats not the point :-). I do plan on updating this regularly but if its anything like everything else, it will probably fail miserably but its worth a shot.


And i shall be back. 
<3